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The Insane Crossover Story Chapter Six


"Now where are we?" Merry Treat sighed in annoyance. The troupe had been wandering around for what seemed to be hours-- lost in some huge city.
"We don't know where we are again? Well, there's nothing new there," Tabby said matter-of-factly.
"We may have stepped into one of Skeletor's traps, Orko," He-Man hypothesized. "We should keep our guard up."
"Are you sure we aren't still in California?" Petunia Petal asked.
"Everything looks kinda Japanese," Tabby murmured.
"Maybe we've stumbled onto another planet," Whimzee suggested.
"Would you all be quiet?" Brain muttered. "I'm trying to come up with a plan for world domination."
"Why's the noise bothering you?" Pinky queried. "Narf!"
"Because it reminds me of you," Brain replied.
"I still don't know what to make of genetically-altered lab mice," Tess said after a pause.
"I'm sure I could whip up a wonderful recipe for you out of them!" Orko offered.
Jar Jar's eyes opened wide. "Orko, theysa our companions!"
"I'm not sure I like this adventuring life," Petunia Petal sighed.
"Tarkie, where's that map?" Merry Treat called over her shoulder.
A moment later, the Meowth was once again spreading the map out on the ground. The group gathered around it. "This map never seems to do any good," Tarquin frowned.
"I bet we're lost again and we'll vanish in midair--" Tabby started rambling.
"Only if we're lucky," Max interjected.
"--and nobody'll know what happened to us and--" Tabby continued, but was cut short by Merry Treat.
"Cenetra to Tabby, come back!" the white earth pony sighed.
"What's Cenetra?" Ursa Minor asked curiously.
"That's where Tabby and I are from," Merry Treat confirmed.
"Sounds like a singer, not a location," Sam said.
"Whatever," Merry Treat said, and looked at the map. "Now... let's see..."
"I just want to go home," Petunia Petal moaned. "I don't think there's any hope for turning Max into a proper Tea Bunny at this point."
Just then, Max jumped past her, screaming, "Booga-booga-booga!"
Whimzee glanced over her shoulder nervously. "I think I just heard something in those bushes."
"It could be Skeletor," He-Man warned, unsheathing his sword. "Stand back!"
"Or one of the movie snakes," Orko added.
"Movie snakes? What are you talking about, Orko?" Ursa Minor asked.
"Useless junk, I think," Tarquin commented.
"I do that all the time," Tabby nodded.
"Useless junk is the best kind of junk," Sam commented.
"Maybe it's a seachimp!" Pinky suggested. "Zort!"
"There are no seachimps, Pinky," Brain sighed.
"Oh, it can't be anything dangerous," Tess assured the group.
I saw something in those bushes, Merry Treat, Spearow said to his trainer.
"Wassa he be talkin' about?" Jar Jar questioned the pony.
"Spearow thinks he saw something in the bushes," Merry Treat translated. She kept her eyes on the green leaves. She hadn't been receiving any bad vibes, so maybe it was just a stray pet. She decided to keep a hold of her Senshi pen for a bit, at least.
"Target practice!" Max exclaimed, whipping out his luger.
"Nice pen," Sam said, observing the item that Merry Treat was gripping. "If I didn't know better, I'd say that's a mark-five transformation pen device, but why would you have one of those? That's just silly."
Tabby looked at the expression on Merry Treat's face, and couldn't help but be suspicious. What's she doing with that pen again? thought the unicorn.
Merry Treat didn't notice the suspicious stare, and decided to ignore Sam's comment. She turned to her friends. "I think we should find a place to pitch camp. There's a park over there, I think. Let's check it out."
* * *
A while later, the group was seated around a fire in an isolated corner of the park. "Fortunately, we have no regard for ordinances about lighting fires in city parks," Sam commented.
"Eleanore and Tweeg, you've been awfully quiet," Tess commented.
"We're plotting," Eleanore snapped.
"I just want to try making some gold," Tweeg complained.
"So-o-o... anybody know any good ghost stories?" Tabby said, eyes opening wide in excitement. "I'm always scared silly but they're simply so cool--"
"I do, but they're all stupid," Merry Treat said bluntly.
"O-o-h... not ghosts, no!" Ursa Minor said in a quivering voice.
"Ghosts give people bad dreams," Whimzee said in agreement. "Like one I had last night..."
"What was it about?" Tarquin questioned.
"It's always so interesting to hear about dreams," Tabby agreed.
"Yeah! I'm sure it's not as strange as some of the dreams I have," Merry Treat said cheerfully.
Your dreams are always strange! Spearow chirped at her in his own language.
"Well," Whimzee began, "it wasn't that long, but it was so vivid. Crystal was calling out to me to come back, and then I woke up..."
"Pinky, are you pondering what I'm pondering?" Brain asked of his companion.
"I think so, Brain, but wouldn't marshmallow ghosts melt in the sunlight?" Pinky said after a pause.
"No, Pinky! If I set everything up correctly, I could have the entire world dream about me as its leader!" Brain explained. "Then--"
"What kind of a fool would worry about dreams like that?" Eleanore sniffed at Whimzee's concern.
Ursa Minor gasped. "Whimzee, do ya think somethin's wrong?"
"I don't know." Whimzee shook her head. "I'm been trying not to worry about it through the day, but..."
"I would suggest you go back to your home as soon as possible, Whimzee," He-Man declared. "Who knows what evil may have invaded while you were gone?"
"Someone like King Snake," Orko agreed.
"Maybe you're right," Whimzee said after a pause. "I've probably abandoned them in a midst of a great disaster!"
"Issa not your fault," Jar Jar consoled her.
"Yeah, don't blame yourself. We had no idea this was going to happen," Tess agreed.
Whimzee stood up abruptly. "I should head back now. I don't mind traveling at night." She smiled slightly. "That's what I do all the time."
"Orko and I will accompany you back, Whimzee," He-Man declared. "We'd never let a lady travel on her own."
"Would you... would you happen to be going through Tea Bunny Land again?" Petunia Petal spoke up hesitantly.
"If we came through there on the way here, we should go through it on the way back," Orko said.
"Would you mind... would you mind if I came along?" Petunia Petal glanced around at everyone. "No offense, but this trip just isn't shaping up the way I thought it would."
"Oh, we understand!" Merry Treat said quickly.
"So He-Man, Orko, Whimzee, and Petunia are leaving," Tabby figured.
"Ursa Minor, you'll have to go back to Starry Up with us, too," Whimzee said.
"Yeah," Ursa Minor mumbled. "I was havin' fun, though..."
"Have a safe trip, you guys!" Tess said as the five packed up. "Whimzee, good luck back at the Milky Way."
"Yes! Thank you!" Whimzee waved, and with that, she, Ursa Minor, He-Man, Orko, and Petunia Petal were off.
"That cut our numbers down drastically," Tweeg commented after several minutes of silence.
"Poit," Pinky agreed, his ears dropping.
"Yes, it's kinda sad, actually--" Merry Treat was abruptly cut-off in mid-sentence by a shout.
"All right, hold it!" cried the voice of a girl.
All heads turned in the direction the voice was coming from. All eyes rested on a young, blonde-haired girl with rather large blue eyes. She was dressed in an interesting outfit that consisted of a white bodysuit and a short, blue pleated skirt. She wore white elbow-length gloves and knee-length red boots. Her blonde hair was up in an odd style that appeared to be two hairbuns with long tails falling down to her knees.
Merry Treat let out a gasp-- not out of fear, but out of surprise. How did we end up in Tokyo? she thought in confusion.
"I am Sailor Moon, champion of justice! And in the name of the moon, I shall punish you!" the girl declared in a forceful tone.
"And don't think she's the only one, either!" cried another voice as a second blonde-haired girl in a similar outfit came up beside Sailor Moon. "She's got a lotta help!" This girl's suit was mostly orange, save for a navy blue bow on her chest with a small yellow button in the center, and a yellow bow at the back of the skirt. "I am Sailor Venus!" she said.
"You said it, Venus! We're gonna bust these Nega-creeps! I am Sailor Jupiter!" came another girl. This one was a tall brunette with green eyes, and her hair was pulled up in a high ponytail. Her outfit was similar to the one worn by the girl she had just called by the name of Venus, but hers was mostly green with pink bows.
"Yeah! What makes you think you can just show up here and try to hurt innocent people? I'm Sailor Mars, and we won't stand for it!" Yet two more girls showed up. The one speaking had long black hair and was wearing a similar outfit that was mostly red with violet bows and red high-heeled shoes.
"That's right! We're gonna stop you!" cried the last girl. She had short blue hair and her outfit was blue with light blue bows and knee-length blue boots with a white line going around the tops. "I am Sailor Mercury!"
"Wassa goin' on?" Jar Jar said, frightened. "Meesa wasn't too clumsy again, wassa I?"
"Whoa! Luna and Artemis were right when they told us they saw some bizarre creatures!" Sailor Venus said in a surprised tone.
Luna and Artemis... they must be who were sneaking around in the bushes, Merry Treat noted in her mind.
"No kidding! What are they, Mercury?" Sailor Jupiter turned to her friend.
"We're wondering the same thing about you guys," Tarquin said under his breath.
Sailor Mercury was furiously typing on what looked like a palm-top computer. "I'm not sure..." She stopped typing for a moment to study the screen. "From my readings, it says they aren't from the Negaverse."
"Well, that one sure looks like it came from the Negaverse!" Sailor Mars commented, gesturing her head towards Jar Jar.
"Yousa jumping to conclusions, methinks!" he said quickly in a scared tone.
Just like the people in those Godzilla movies, Tabby thought. Hey-- and if this is Japan-- She began tittering softly to herself.
"That one, too," Sailor Jupiter agreed, pointing at Tweeg.
"Finally, someone who sees me as evil" Tweeg said in relief.
"You have a long way to go, Tweegie!" Eleanore said sharply to her son.
"Oh my, they talk!" exclaimed Sailor Moon. "But what is that accent on that... weird-lookin' thing? And why is the Negaverse sending out such... strange creatures?"
"I hope that's not one of Snowball's schemes, too," Brain muttered to himself.
"Maybe it's a fun-fun, silly-willy place!" Pinky laughed hysterically. "Can we go there?"
"O-o-o-oh! A little white bunny! How cute!!" Sailor Moon squealed, catching sight of Max.
Crying out triumphantly and waving his arms in the air, Max exclaimed, "At last, my fans have arrived!!!"
"Lady, you probably wouldn't be saying that if you saw the way he eats," Sam added.
"See, Sam, I told you the marketing people where wrong; the public loves me!" Max said as he jumped into Sailor Moon's arms only to be thrown back to the ground.
"EEEK! It touched me!" the girl screamed.
"Ack! Lower the decibels!" cried Sailor Mars, covering her ears.
"What are you talking about? My decibels are fine!" The blonde angrily turned towards the other scout.
"You are going on in a high-pitched voice and it's annoying!" the black-haired girl shot back.
"Oh, no, not this again!" Sailor Mercury groaned.
"Guys, this is no time for arguments!" Sailor Venus chided the quarreling scouts.
"They sound like when you and Clever Clover start going at it, Tabby!" Merry Treat commented.
"Oh, no, we don't sound like that!" The unicorn turned to face her friend.
"Do too!" Merry Treat angrily put her hooves on her hips.
"Do not!"
"Do too!"
"Do not!"
"Do too!"
"Now they're going at it!" Tess groaned in the same tone as Sailor Mercury. The two looked at each other with the same "not this again" expression.
Merry Treat waved her hoof in dismissal and turned back to the scouts. "Please believe us! We don't wanna hurt anyone! I can assure you that we aren't from the Negaverse! Just let us explain..."
"It's not another name for M.A.V.O., is it?" Tweeg questioned.
"Of course not," Eleanore said. "M.A.V.O. would never go by such a trivial name as ‘Negaverse'."
"The Negaverse is a dark, evil, place that is full of terrible people that like to send out evil creatures to destroy people," the Christmas pony explained.
"It doesn't sound much different than M.A.V.O.," Tweeg said thoughtfully. "Except they're more into sending out evil tax collectors."
"We ran into a bunch of weirdos..." Sailor Mars trailed off as her eyes scanned over the strange party.
"How do you know about the Negaverse?" Sailor Venus gave the mare a look of curiosity.
"Well... uh..." Merry Treat threw her friends a nervous glance.
"I sense something..." a small black cat that came up beside Sailor Moon murmured softly to herself. She stared hard at the pony.
Merry Treat gulped. "Well... uhh... I... uhh... err..." What her companions didn't know was that she actually had a secret identity as Sailor Fauna.
"Out with it, MT! What are you hiding? I know you're hiding something." Tabby turned towards her friend. "You're trying not to tell us something. Tell! Tell!"
Merry Treat set her jaw. "Sailor Fauna told me about the Negaverse." She swallowed nervously as she saw the expressions on the scouts' faces and Tabby's change from mere curiosity to just plain confusion.
"Sailor Fauna? Luna..." Sailor Moon slowly turned to the black cat with a yellow crescent moon on her forehead.
"Sailor Fauna is one of the lost Senshi..." the cat, known as Luna, trailed off and fixed her eyes on Merry Treat.
"A talking cat. Isn't she the cutest thing?" Tabby squealed.
No sooner had she said this when a white cat with the same symbol on his forehead stepped up next to Luna. This one had big, blue eyes. "But Sailor Fauna... she disappeared a long time ago," he said in a curious tone.
"That's what I thought, Artemis... pony, how do you know her?" Luna stepped forward a few steps to better see the white pony.
"I'm her! Err-- close friends with her," Merry Treat quickly saved. She could just hope that her friends and the scouts hadn't caught the first thing she had said.
"You have yet to introduce her to us, MT," Tabby said threateningly. "Does this Sailor Fauna have anything to do with that moon-dust you keep blathering about? Hmm? What in the world are you hiding?"
"Uh, yeah, well... sometime, yeah," Merry Treat replied to Tabby's first comment, but kept her fearful eyes on the bewildered scouts. She was unsure of how to answer the second part of her friend's question, and decided to ignore it. She could sense that the scouts were on to her. "Maybe sometime."
"Why would a Sailor Scout reveal her identity?" Sailor Jupiter wrinkled her brow in confusion and suspicion.
"She's just like you, Sailor Moon. Incredibly absent-minded," Sailor Venus joked and tossed her friend a cheerful expression to show that she was kidding.
"Grrr, traitor!" came the reply.
"Blabbety blah blah," Sam interjected.
"Blabbety blah," added Max.
"Well, if you aren't from the Negaverse, then what are you doing here?" Sailor Mercury clasped her computer shut and stepped up a little closer to the menagerie in front of her.
"Well, we don't really know what we're doing anymore, but we're seeking revenge on somebody," Tabby explained.
"Hmm... do we trust them?" Sailor Mercury turned to her fellow scouts.
"I think we can, scouts. I don't believe they're dangerous." Artemis stepped up next to the blue-haired girl.
"Oh, if that's what you think about me..." Eleanore muttered under her breath. "One of the most dependable M.A.V.O. members."
"What's that, Mommy?" Tweeg queried.
"Oh, be quiet," Eleanore hissed. "Don't mention anything about our dealings with M.A.V.O., and maybe we can get these girls to do something useful for us."
"Where are you guys from, anyway?" Sailor Jupiter asked, curiosity getting the best of her. "No place I've ever been..."
"Oh, just about everywhere," Tweeg said.
Sailor Moon raised a skeptical eyebrow. "Really?"
"Well, with that... thing hanging out with you, I'd believe it!" Sailor Venus nodded at Jar Jar.
"Meesa be a Gungan," Jar Jar filled her in.
"From Naboo," Tabby added. "Ever been to Naboo? It's a nice place. If you like swampy kinds of places."
"Sorry we were suspicious," Sailor Jupiter apologized.
"That's all right," Merry Treat said.
"Phew! Am I ever glad that's over!" Tess heaved a sigh of relief.
"Hey, what are those things!?" Sailor Moon exclaimed and pointed at the three Pokèmon, which she had just taken the time to notice. "They don't look like anything I've ever seen!"
"You haven't seen the likes of a lot of us before," Tabby pointed out.
"Well, not unless you watch a lot of sci-fi movies," Tarquin commented.
"Spearow row!" Spearow added.
"Or cartoons," Tabby added.
"Don't worry, those are just our Pokèmon. They won't hurt you unless you provoke them," Merry Treat assured. "We should be clearing out of here soon, anyway."
"Hey, do you guys happen to want to come with us?" Tabby queried. "It seems like that's what just about everybody we meet up with wants to do."
"I dunno..." Sailor Jupiter trailed off.
"O-o-oh, sounds cool!" Sailor Moon exclaimed.
"But what about the Negaverse?" Sailor Mercury said in an anxious tone. "If they attack and we're not here, who is going to stop them?"
"Good point! I guess we had better stay here," Sailor Mars confirmed with a hint of dismay in her voice.
"Don't worry, Sailor Scouts. Luna and I will stay here and keep an eye on things while you are gone. You girls need to get on an adventure sometime in your lives," Artemis said warmly to the five girls.
"What? You mean it?" Sailor Venus exclaimed excitedly. Then her smile faded. "But you two are no match against those Nega-creeps."
"Yeah! We don't want you to get hurt!" Sailor Mars agreed.
"This conversation is dragging on and on, just like the plot from one of those Japanese cartoon shows," Sam commented, turning to Max.
"Only with less speed lines," Max replied.
"Artemis and I will be all right. We will contact you if there is trouble. Don't worry about us," Luna insisted. "Now, run along and have a good time."
"Yipe-e-e-e!!! Oh, this is so cool!" Sailor Moon cried out gleefully.
"Then you'll have to sign this list of Rules and Regulations!" Tabby said promptly, and held out the sheet to the excited girls.
The five Sailor Scouts huddled around the paper and scanned it over before signing their names. "Here ya go!" Sailor Jupiter handed the paper back to Tabby.
"You know what? Eleanore's name isn't on this," Merry Treat frowned, carefully inspecting the growing list of signatures at the bottom of the tattered sheet.
"Oh, I must not have remembered then," Tabby said absentmindedly.
"Ooh, and we need to cross out a few of these signatures since some people left," Merry Treat continued.
"What was that about me?" Eleanore questioned quickly.
"We seem to have passed you by on the Rules and Regulations list," Merry Treat explained.
"What's that?" Eleanore asked suspiciously.
"Just a few laws we've set down," Tarquin explained. "They're not that hard to follow, really, especially if you can't summon up monsters in the first place."
Eleanore snatched the sheet from Tabby. "No insults against my Tweeg?" she said in outrage. "Who do you expect to follow these rules?"
"Well, everyone else has," Tess pointed out.
"I thought it was kind of nice for a change," Tweeg said timidly.
"Your opinion doesn't count!" Eleanore snapped. "Tweegie, how do you expect to become a good villain while hanging around a bunch of goody-goodies like these?"
"I figured out the correct way to make gold out of buttermilk from them!" Tweeg defended himself.
"And did you try the updated recipe, Tweegie?"
"Well, no, I didn't have time--"
"Then it probably doesn't work," Eleanore continued. "I'm not hanging out with these do-gooders any more."
"But you were going to teach me to be a good villain!" Tabby interjected.
"That was before you mentioned this rules thing," Eleanore said simply. "I don't think there's any hope for you."
"Oh well," Tabby sighed.
"Don't worry about it, Tabby," Merry Treat said to console the unicorn, and lay a hoof on her shoulder. "You don't need to be a villain."
"Is youssa gonna leave now, Eleanore?" Jar Jar asked, trying to conceal his excitement at the fact.
"Yes, immediately," Eleanore said firmly. "And Tweegie, if you really want to become a M.A.V.O. member in good standing, you'd better come with me."
"I guess so," Tweeg said. "I guess it would be good to see L.B. again."
"You're not half the villain that L.B. is," Eleanore sniffed. "Come along, now."
"Our numbers really are diminishing," Tarquin lamented as he watched the two walk off.
"Maybe we'll run into some of them again," Merry Treat said.
Meanwhile, the Sailor Scouts had been exchanging goodbyes with Luna and Artemis. "We'll miss you two!" Sailor Venus said, and scooped up Artemis in a loving hug. "Be careful!"
"We will, and you girls be careful, too," Luna said as Sailor Moon gave her a goodbye hug.
"Why do I get the impression that we picked up another useless life form?" Sam questioned.
"Probably because we have, Sam," Max said.
"You crack me up, little buddy," Sam chuckled.
"Have fun!" Artemis called cheerfully as the group set off once more.
"Are you sure we're doing the right thing, Artemis? I mean, what will we do if the Negaverse attacks and they're away..." Luna trailed off, suddenly becoming aware of the consequences.
"Don't worry, Luna. We can contact them on the communicator. Besides, an adventure like this will be good for them," Artemis assured.
"I hope you're right, Artemis; I hope you're right." Luna watched the group walking off down the street. Sailor Moon was talking nonstop to Jar Jar, who was listening intently; but the girl suddenly tripped over a rock in the street, and caused the Gungan to fall over as well.
"Okay, so she can't walk and talk at the same time..." Luna sighed and sweat-dropped.

To be continued...


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